Oh Bummer

It's Saturday morning. The sun woke me up today. It was fantastic! I will have sun on three sides of my apartmen when summer hits, I can't wait! And I can look forward to a nice cross breeze as well. Oh boy! There are dark clouds hanging around here and there and as soon as I'm done writing I'm headed outside to walk between then for a while!
Yesterday I chose to walk to work. It is always fun to walk because I can pay attention to more little things than when I rid my bike. On my bike I'm focused on staying alive and not falling into the road!
When I had almost reached work I saw a coworker coming out of the 7-11 and she was watching over her shoulder and I couldn't figure out what she was doing. I finally caught up with her and she was really concerned about the little thing that she says transpires in there every morning. The clerk in the 7-11 refuses to let this homeless guy buy beer, she said he's there every morning. I'm thinking more power to him, to not perpetuate the mans problems but then again, how does a person handle that? I remember living in Oregon (college in Newberg) before and I'd come downtown on Friday nights and work in a soup kitchen. Not often but enough to see regular faces. Some of those people chose to stay on the streets and battle it out. I never understood it. Some choose to go to a facility with a bed and chose "lock down" at 8 pm, the rest refuse. Its an interesting cycle.
I also know its naive to hand some of them money but I try to give them the benefit of the doubt I guess. Who knows, someday it may really matter to one of them, I like to think it matters each time.
So back to the story, I wasn't sure if she was about to turn around and go buy the beer for him, it was interesting to watch her react that way.

Friday at work was busy, people are in the mood to get out of town I guess, they were all buying things for their upcoming trips. Maybe they are anticipating refund checks on their taxes this year. I know I am. I know where I'm headed once I get it into my hot little hands too. No surprise I know!

I'm trying to pay attention to those that are just headed out there to see what they can see. I ask alot of questions. How are you doing that, where will you go and the big one, WHY are you going. I could never answer that question with any real solid answer.

At the end of the day I look forward to making my way home. It still seems like new to me. Which is funny. I'm still tryingto find the Safeway Grocery store and I manage to walk/ride by it almost every day. Last night I wandered in to do a mini shop for the weekend. So had all of the city on this side of the park blocks, lines went down the aisles. This market is not my favorite and I'll tell you why. There are always beggers and bums outside this safeway, not just one or two but many and at each door and they are usually young ones here as well, I find it disturbing because I'm walking out of there with a handful of groceries. Though I do remind myself that I work each day to pay for them. But still.
The other reason I am not comfortable there is that on one side its lined with windows and they are above your head but at street level so people can see in. They can watch you shop, see your picks off the shelf, judge what you're going to eat. I mean think about it. When you are in line you can see what kind of night a person is going to have, whether they are single or not (box of pizza), what kind of mood they are in (sad ones are buying Coca Cola and brownie mix). Whether the party is at their house (case of beer), or just a pre-func (six pack of cheap beer). Kids at home (something quick and fun for dinner), first date (that's the bottle of wine). You get the point. We all know which one I am but last night I didn't buy brownie mix or a pizza :) I had the ingredients for a delicious bowl of Pho. Or my American version of it. Noodle soup. Yummy.
So on my way out with my food I chose not to dig out my iPod and really rub it into the man sitting on the street getting rained on. Ugh.
Despite all that I love this city. Its really hard to put into words. Every day I try to put my finger on it but I can't. I mean, I'm as lonely as ever and I encounter all sorts of crazy every day but I love it.
The other day I was walking across the street to get a cup of coffee and I had called my mother to say hi. Just as she picked up the phone an ambulance was coming by so I waited until it passed, since it's really loud in the city and after he'd passed the intersection the train came whizzing by. Since I couldn't cross the street I was waiting and a big FedEx truck came booming by. So mom and I are laughing by this point. As I'm crossing the street finally a really angry bum is yelling at the top of his lungs, not to anyone in particular. Ah the sounds of the city. I could hear mom say "where in the world are you?" "Oh just crossing the street outside my building" ha! I love it! It really made me laugh. In the matter of 5 minutes she heard everything. I love it, something is always going on here. Even though it is just sound at the moment pretty soon it will be action! Yeah!
So, off to see what I can see for now. The next cloud is passing I better get out there. Tonight I'm riding my bike across the bridge to a dinner at a Mexican place in SE. That should prove interesting.
Karen (merry wanderer)